Play Sanma no Mei Tantei (Japan) Online

Sanma no Mei Tantei (or The Three Famous Detectives if you're not into Japanese titles) is one of those NES games that makes you go, "Wait, how did this even get made?" You play as three detectives who are, frankly, terrible at their jobs—but in the best way possible. One’s obsessed with food, another’s a total drama queen, and the third... well, let’s just say he shouldn’t be allowed near evidence.

The cases start simple—like finding a stolen lunchbox—but quickly spiral into nonsense involving talking cats and overly dramatic witnesses. You’ll poke around pixelated crime scenes, collect random junk (why does this suspect have a rubber chicken?), and occasionally stumble onto the right answer by accident. The dialogue’s so over-the-top it feels like a parody, and the solutions are either painfully obvious or completely unhinged. No in-between.

It’s janky, it’s weird, and it’s got that old-school charm where the developers clearly didn’t care if anything made sense. If you’ve ever wanted to solve crimes while laughing at how bad your detectives are, this is your game.